[ic] all the voices mistaken

[pheasantboy]

In the end, they got Ren settled into bed, with a glass of water and his phone—though a big part of Akechi would have been far more comfortable if that glass was a sippy cup. He wanted to stay, to be on hand, but he didn't need to be told crowding Ren wouldn't be for the best. And he can be on hand just as well downstairs in the park as in his apartment.

So here he is, sitting on a park bench with his head in his hands, having vaulted the closed park gate as if he's done it a thousand times before—which may not even be untrue. Besides his fear for Ren, the things he's learned rotate in his head. He notices his episodes, now—that never happened before. And this thing Ren believes he did... what can it have been? Something everyone but him knows about, clearly. Something bad enough to make them hate him? Even to kill him?

Perhaps not coincidentally, he's sitting on the same bench another Akechi was feeding the birds from, long ago. The bag of breadcrumbs he forgot earlier has vanished, as if it never was.

Comments

[willowandoak]

[ He nods slowly. ] Yeah, I think so too.

[ He has a few candidates in mind already. That Akechi isn't among them, which is a shame because he'd love to be able to pin it on him.

His next words are in a drier tone. ] He was understanding, huh.

[pheasantboy]

[He doesn't remember how the board described him (the "pleasant" one), or he might have quoted that. But he remembers enough; his voice dries out in turn, just a bit, as water rushes into a mug.]

Quite in character, don't you think? For one of us to be unable to recall our own attempted murder.

[Oh, Akechi. But he hands over the mug all the same, giving it a little stir.]

Here you are. Help yourself to sugar.

[willowandoak]

Thanks. [ He adds a generous spoonful of sugar into his mug, and then another. Leblanc's coffee has ruined him.

It's drinkable, with all the sugar added. Even palatable, in its own way. Ren's had worse. He disguises his hesitation by taking a long, considering sip. Then: ] Is he like you, then? Forgetful?

[ "Forgetful" is certainly one way of putting it. ]

[pheasantboy]

[Akechi thinks about this; he really does. Is Ren like him? He cradles his own mug, still empty but for the coffee granules, in his hands.]

At home, I thought he was.

[But then Ren arrived here. And he was shocked by what Akechi is, wasn't he? It doesn't prove anything, but...]

[willowandoak]

You thought that at home, or he was like that at home?

[ He would still be happy to see Akechi's Ren disemboweled, but he's doing a better job now of hiding it. As well as... that... he also finds that he's curious. ]

[pheasantboy]

It was—complicated. [He turns again, to run hot water into his own cup.]

Are you sure you want to listen to all of this?

[willowandoak]

Sure, if you wanna tell me. We're friends, right?

[ And that's what friends do, or something. He takes another sip of coffee. It gets slightly worse every time, but he'll be able to finish it, he's pretty sure. ]

[pheasantboy]

[Friends? Really? Despite himself, he glows. Nobody's said that to him since he arrived.]

Well, if you say so.

[Turning back to lean against the counter, he stirs his cup, setting down the spoon on a little tray before cradling the hot cup in his hands; he looks more serious.]

You know, I can't even tell if I'm remembering right. And it seems so normal it should work that way.

[willowandoak]

[ Ren just nods, encouraging Akechi to keep going. It's not surprising that he finds that normal, given everything else. ]

[pheasantboy]

[The cup is warm in his hands; he stares down at the steam coming off it, eyes glazing ever so briefly before he blinks.]

...huh. Well, as I was saying. Given that Ren is here, you'll understand I can't go into too much detail. I've mentioned to others before, though, that he seemed to zone out quite often. He did it this afternoon. Yet he insists it's not the same as what happens here to me.

That raised some questions, obviously. [Putting it mildly.]

[willowandoak]

Not the same how?

[pheasantboy]

I'm not sure, to be quite honest with you. It looks the same, I thought.

Though, at home, we forgot him. Not the other way around. We couldn't quite see him, you know.

[No wonder he was so distressed. It seems so very obvious now.]

[willowandoak]

That seems like a pretty big difference.

[ Interesting that Akechi says it looks the same, only to go on and explain the difference. Or a difference, anyway. What does it even look like in his head? ]

[pheasantboy]

lt does. It didn't make sense to me before.

[All the little pieces that hook together, when they didn't before. He doesn't think Ren caused that, not exactly—wasn't he already remembering?]

I had an episode, obviously. He was horrified. As if he'd never seen the like.

[willowandoak]

That makes sense. You said earlier that only happens to you here, right?

[ Why that should happen when Maruki isn't around, Ren has no idea. Why the actualization would change, but not disappear. He leaves that shit to people who are equipped to figure it out. ]

[pheasantboy]

The funny thing is—[he continues quietly]— after I'd spoken to him for a little while. After that episode that distressed him, in fact... I noticed it happening,

I felt it pull. And when I came back, I knew it had happened.

[willowandoak]

[ Huh. ]

Are you happy about that?

[ It seems like progress to Ren. Although he can't say what it's progressing towards, exactly. ]

[pheasantboy]

[The little sideways smile he offers Ren doesn't seem like him—or perhaps it's more like who he was.]

"Happy". That's quite the word for you to choose. No, I... I don't think this is something that will make me happy.

[He glances away, out of the window at the night sky.]

But that doesn't matter. It feels so strange to say that, but it doesn't matter.

[willowandoak]

I mean, like. [ He takes another sip of coffee while he thinks of how to phrase it. ] I know it can't be—fun, or whatever. But if you could change it, would you go back to not noticing? Or would you rather notice?

[pheasantboy]

[He sips his own coffee, eyes bleak. Pain has sounded a rotten deal to him all along, and nothing about this has changed his mind.]

I know you want me to say I've learned better. The truth is that all this confusion and stress—I still don't see the necessity of it.

But I have to resolve what's happening with Ren. That matters more than my own happiness, or even my safety. So I suppose perhaps I do understand all of you, a little better.

[willowandoak]

I don't want you to say anything, Akechi. It was just a question. It's hard to guess how you'd feel about it.

[ He drums his fingers against the side of his mug. ] Are you in danger?

[pheasantboy]

[What a question. And what a thing to have to contemplate- He blinks— just a blink, no more.]

Unless I wander into Tartarus again, I doubt it. We'd have found out, by now, if anyone sincerely meant me harm.

Ren's the one who is in danger. [Which Akechi will prevent, however he can.] I intend to keep him safe. So perhaps I can't say I'm in no danger.

[willowandoak]

Don't—take this the wrong way. [ He isn't sure how to say this without sounding condescending, but he's gonna at least try. ] But most people here could do some stuff to him that you can't do anything about. I get that you want to protect him, but I don't know if putting yourself in the line of fire will help.

[pheasantboy]

Do you really think not?

[Soft, matter-of-fact. Like there's a truth to it that's absent from most of what he says. His cup rests lightly in his hands.]

Of course the rest of you have magic powers I can't do anything about. But if the only way I can save him is to put myself between him and danger, then I will. Wouldn't you do as much for the people you love?

[willowandoak]

Yeah. [ But he doesn't want to talk very much about "the people you love". ] I just think—a likely outcome there is you go down, and they walk over your corpse to get to your Ren. You can protect him without hurting yourself, you know? Figuring out where he shouldn't go, who he should avoid, that kind of thing. You've been here for months, you know this place and the people way better than he does.

[ The change in Sparrow's tone is interesting. It gives Ren hope, weirdly enough, that something can be done for him. ]